Chapter
1, L'Année dernière à Marienbad
The setting of this morning’s
dream was the drawing room of a gentlemen’s club, though on waking I realized
it was actually the game room of the chateau in Resnais’ masterpiece, perhaps Schloss Nymphenburg in Bavaria. I was playing cards with two other gentlemen
and doing rather well. The game was Black
Jack or Twenty one.
For some reason unknown to me, a man at another table did all he could
do to distract me, cracking jokes and making ugly faces. When I could take no more of his attempts to
interrupt me, I looked directly at this joker and clearly but silently mouthed
the words go fuck yourself. Whereupon he brought forth his smartphone from the inside pocket of his Armani tuxedo
and called Security, or possibly the Police, in order to have me removed from
this exclusive club.
It was then I realized that his antipathy stemmed from my attachment to
a young man whose name he could either not remember or, when he could recall
it, he mispronounced (deliberately or not I could not say). Something I was unable to fully remember had
occurred a year or so before between this young man and myself that caused us
to no longer see each other, which filled me with grief for many months
following our separation. Before the authorities
could have me removed I woke, removing myself.